
Dear Sarah PalinDear Sarah PalinDear Sarah Palin3 months ago in Free Verse
Your daughter was 17
And pregnant
Hiding your shame with oversize sweaters
And Sunday school smiles that didn’t reach her eyes
I was 21 and joined in the taunts
Against your sanctimonious scripture
Branding Bristol with the scarlet sum of Abstinence only
Laughing with pleasure at a young girls folly
And her mother’s hypocrisy.
And I am sorry.
Sarah Palin, I hate everything you stand for
I have queer friends who gaze at each other
With such an omniscience and feeling
That it hurts to look
And I have to avert my eyes less I crumble with envy for what they have
I evicted a child from my womb by choice
And I take pr

Epic Rap Battles of History #4 LyricsThe lyrics to the 4th Epic Rap Battles Of HistoryEpic Rap Battles of History #4 Lyrics7 months ago in Sketches More Like This
WARNING: This does contain bad language
EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!!!
Sarah Palin
VS
Lady Gaga
BEGIN
Sarah Palin:
Oh boy, look what we have here
A transvestite with a keyboard trying to be freak of the year
Your voice sounds like a rooster having sex with a frog
They put a lot of lipstick on you, but you still look like a dog
Put down that teacup, honey. Go put on some pants
and Stop letting little monsters teach you how to dance
and You may be Gaga but you ain't lady at all
I've seen those outfits you've been wearing. That takes big balls
Lady Gaga:
I think I'd rather elect

Let It CheckParody: "Let It Check"Let It Check7 months ago in Songs & Lyrics More Like This
Original Song: "Let It Rock" by Kevin Rudolf ft. Lil' Wayne
I see you think your branch is the ace
High behind your Cabinet
What is done to improve your reign
I think your Senate's collective brain is very hollow
So you think I'm a nimrod
And believe that the prez is a small fry
A small fry
A small fry
And so you judge major crime
And you mint a dime
Well I think the Constitution is what you misread
Your popularity with your party is in decline
Because when my speech is live
I, I bring my branch higher
Your branch should start to contrive
'Cause you're not as cool as the prez that was prior
You have t

Sufferings end Ive got broken bones,and plenty of scars..Sufferings end9 months ago in Free Verse More Like This
but you just keep comeing from afar
Ive got blood on my fur and spots on my soul...
I may have tears in my eyes
and doubts of my self
Well who ever says a wolf cant try ..
even if all they really want to do is sit
and cry...
although even at this point
with everything ive took
ive gotta save my pack from this soul steeling cro

Aliens: from a Democrat's PerspectiveAliens: From a Democrat's PerspectiveAliens: from a Democrat's Perspective11 months ago in Flash Fiction & Vignettes More Like This
I know this sounds crazy, but I have seen firsthand the disastrous effects of conservatives on this country.
Conservative ALIENS, that is.
Oh, yes. As a politician- my name shall remain undisclosed, thank you very much- I have traveled to major cities across the globe. I can say for a fact: aliens do exist. And they're Republican.
In New York I met with a "woman"- *cough* thing *cough* who called itself Ann Coulter. (Xorg'Xa sounds more apt.) All I can say is: It most certainly has tentacles, and if not, something that sounds very similar to tentacles.
Next we move to Sarah Palin, who I met at a book

Bill Maher vs. Common SenseBill Maher has declared that the Republican Party is at war with common sense. "I think Republicans live in a world now where whatever a liberal says, no matter how sensible, is automatically evil, wrong, and needs to be fought with the fervor of a starving raccoon on crystal meth," he said during a recent New Rules segment on his HBO show Real Time.Bill Maher vs. Common Sense1 year ago in Editorial More Like This
You know what's the worst part about Bill Maher?
It's not that he bashes Republicans. They have been wrong on many issues (Patriot Act, WMDs, waterboarding, oil subsidies) and Maher is perfectly justified in bashing them because of itthough to him, Republicans are always wrong and liberal

Antics in Freshman Biology on HalloweenTales of SubstatutesAntics in Freshman Biology on Halloween1 year ago in Stories & Vignettes More Like This
Antics in Freshman Biology: Sarah Palin as God's Secretary
It's Halloween and the bell has already rung when Jasper sneaks into class late dressed as Jesus. The Substatute denies him the work for his absence and he settles sulking into his seat.
He pleaded with me, I knew I shouldn't do it, but who could deny Jesus? "In Sarah Palin's name" I said mater of factly convincing myself that I had to prove my loyalty to the politician I'd debated as in AP Government that morning. Putting on my dignified innocent nature I approached the rude woman with frizzy grey hair and small beady eyes conjuring the last of my nerve. "I'm

Sarah and SamI do not like Sarah Palin, Uncle Sam,Sarah and Sam1 year ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
I hate Sarah Palin, the evil woman.
I would not praise her for a boat,
I would not praise her for a fur coat,
I would club her senseless to save a seal,
I would shoot her arms off to hear her squeal.
I do not like Sarah Palin, Uncle Sam,
I really friggin hate her, the evil woman.
I would not invade China for lots of rice,
I would not invade Africa for all its spice,
I wouldn't conquer Canada for its oil,
I wouldn't conquer Russia for its soil.
I do not like Sarah Palin, Uncle Sam,
I wish she'd go to hell,
please or gods be damned.

Arthur Christmas 3D ReviewArthur Christmas 3D Review1 year ago in Reviews & Guides More Like This
On Christmas night at the North Pole, Santa's youngest son looks to use his father's high-
tech operation for an urgent mission. Hi this is KingJames92 your guide to movies. Well
I know it's been a while since I have reviewed a movie. That's because I haven't been to
the movies in a while until now. Knowing the fact that we are only four days left to
Christmas, I decided to a review a movie today that is all about Christmas. Coming from
the same guys who made the incredibely charming and loveable Wallace & Gromit and Chicken
Run Aardman Animations comes a Christmas movie in which I think is just as good as their
other movies if not bet

TftW: Ellie Pigs OutEllie Tomlin was the wife of politician Robert Tomlin and just like him she was also in politics, but she wasn't as good as he was.TftW: Ellie Pigs Out2 years ago in Short Stories More Like This
To say she was not too bright was an understatement, she was dumb and extremely clueless as to what people really thought of her. Most people just lied to her and pretended that she was a 'nice person' to be around, even though she was oblivious as to what they really were saying.
She made the mistake one evening of firing one of her caterers after a gala dinner ball went from bad to worse when an over-cooked roast caused one of the guests to have a fit, later that evening said caterer put a potion in h
When the Oceans Rise2 years ago in Short Stories
More Like This

Sarah Palin, Feminist?I heard something on the radio the other day that really got me thinking. The station, a news organization that some years ago went under new management and is now like a Canadian version of Fox News, was talking about feminism. Oh, no, a Fox-like station talking about feminism? Yeah, I know, right.Sarah Palin, Feminist?2 years ago in Editorial More Like This
So the commentator argued that women like Sarah Palin and Michelle Bachman were the "true" feminists, whereas self-proclaimed feminists like Margaret Atwood were wasting their time in a pseudo-progressive hippie colony of the mind. My first reaction was, of course, to shake my fist at the radio and tell

100 Questions For ConservativeHello. This quiz is for conservatives. If you are a liberal, click here.100 Questions For Conservative2 years ago in Editorial More Like This
Warning: Do not read this list if you do not wish to have your political beliefs challenged. Click here to go to Fox News. Otherwise, feel free to continue.
Consider the questions carefully and make sure to take time to read the articles linked and watch the videos featured.
...
1) If Republicans are for limited government, why hasn't one Republican president reduced the size of the federal government?
2) Is it considered limited government when our military spending, at nearly $700 billion, exceeds that of the next 17 countries combined?
3) How about when our navy

Sarah's Tea PartyPsychotic smirk of the CheshireSarah's Tea Party2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
madness of the Hatter
rage of the Red Queen
kettle whistles nonsense to a frantic boil
She steeps the potent tea-
red-peddled bias
aromatic slurs
apple pie lies
Hatter sips
Cat grins
Queen fumes
Alice wonders...
-----------------------------------------
(c)2011

The Fletcher Memorial HomeTake all your overgrown infants away somewhereThe Fletcher Memorial Home2 years ago in Stories & Vignettes More Like This
And build them a home
A little place of their own
The Fletcher Memorial Home
For incurable tyrants and kings
They can appear to themselves every day
On closed circuit t.v.
To make sure they're still real
It's the only connection they feel
"Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome
reagan and haig
mr. begin and friend
mrs. thatcher and paisley
mr. brezhnev and party
the ghost of mccarthy
the memories of nixon
and now adding colour a group of anonymous
latin american meat packing glitterati"
Did they expect us to treat them with any respect
They can polish their medals and sharpen

Canadian Metal DayIt's Canadian Metal dayCanadian Metal Day2 years ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
I'm Canadian Metal gay
I'm going wild
I'm a Canadian Metal child

ErectionErectionErection2 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
It comes and goes,
day in and day out,
and everyone knows,
that fish are exempt.
fish cannot achieve erection,
it is simply not possible for them,
such as sarah palin in an election,
with everyone knowing she cannot win.
An erection is quite the spectacle,
blood and flesh combined,
to achieve a certain hardness which,
should never be undermined.
Mammals do love their erection,
it gets them ready for sex,
and when they don't get their sex,
they become angry like a T-Rex.
It is a shame then that fish,
experience nothing like this,
though I doubt their very phased,
swimming down in the abyss.

Sarah Palin, robot.From the cold north they brought you/dresses you up to look human/ filled your robot mind/with historical false hoods/political wrongs/ put you on parade/followed by fools/gave you/an all access pass/to our heads/an attempt for domination/you need to be left in the rain/to rust/no sweet girl to save youSarah Palin, robot.2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This

What have we becomeWhat's wrong with us?What have we become2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
We've let our world become Hell,
Been slowly poisoning our planet,
And while the Arctic's melting, we don't give a shit,
We just keep creating more smoke and smog,
Acting as if everything's swell.
Just got to burn fuel made from the bodies of the ancients,
Just got to have it, drill baby drill,
All the while hurting our environment.
And when our bill comes due for what we have done
The youth of tomorrow will pay for the youth of yesterday.
Our oceans have become trash soup,
Thanks a bunch for that our disposable culture.
Now reducing is for the insane few,
If it's broken, just buy another new.
Why recycle?

Task 152 - End Like ThisHe hadn't meant for things to end like this.Task 152 - End Like This2 years ago in Flash Fiction & Vignettes More Like This
He was the Robin Hood typestealing from the rich to give to the poorand she had been the damsel in distress.
They had met only a few weeks before, but that was all it took for their love to blossom. She was a young, pretty thing, but with a father who had a heart of stone, and he was a wanted criminal, with only the rough but loving Little John to call his family.
No, scratch that last part.
He never would have guessed that Little John would have fallen for her too; it wasn't like that in the storybooks.
"We're brothers!" The plea was desperate, unbelieving, denying, and was met by